A man walks into a bar and he's really pissed. The bartender gives him a drink and asks what the problem is. All he says is, "All lawyers are assholes." A man sitting in the corner shouts, "I take offense to that!" The pissed-off guy asks him, "Why? Are you a lawyer?" He replies, "No, I'm an asshole." Rate the joke: 1 2 3 4 5 23 people already rated this joke. Send this joke to a friend Start your day smiling with a funny joke by SMS. Q: Some months have 31 days; how many have 28? A: 12, all of them! Rate the joke: 1 2 3 4 5 779 people already rated this joke. Send this joke to a friend Start your day smiling with a funny joke by SMS. Q: You have a match and you go into a house and there is an oil lamp a stove and a fire place all ready to be started... what do you light first? A: The Match! Rate the joke: 1 2 3 4 5 18 people already rated this joke. Send this joke to a friend Start your day smiling with a funny joke by SMS. Q: If there are 3 apples and you take away 2, how many do you have? A: 2, you took them, remember? Rate the joke: 1 2 3 4 5 111 people already rated this joke. Send this joke to a friend Start your day smiling with a funny joke by SMS.