A Tennessee man and an Alabama man were both fighting in a war and were captured by the enemy. "Before we kill you" said the enemy, "do you have any last requests?" "Yes," said the Alabaman. "I want you to play the song 'Yeah, Alabama' before you kill me" "Sure," said the enemy. "And what about you, Tennessean?" "You have to kill me before you play 'Yeah, Alabama?'" Rate the joke: 1 2 3 4 5 11 people already rated this joke. Send this joke to a friend Start your day smiling with a funny joke by SMS. Little Danny was on a park bench eating all of his Halloween candy. An old lady came over and said, "Son, don't you know that eating all of that candy will rot your teeth, give you acne, and make you sick?" "My grandfather lived to be 110 years old!" replied Danny. "Did he eat six candy bars at a sitting?" the old lady asked. "No, said Danny, but he minded his own freakin' business." Rate the joke: 1 2 3 4 5 16 people already rated this joke. Send this joke to a friend Start your day smiling with a funny joke by SMS. Britney Spears had just bought her a new car and decided to go shopping with her friend and rival, Christina Aguilera. A few hours later she came out and realizes she had locked her keys in the car, so they spent a few hours pacing around the car trying to figure out what to do. Finally, Britney looked off into the distance and saw storm cloud. She turned to her friend and said," Quick, think of something because a storm is coming and I left the top open!" Rate the joke: 1 2 3 4 5 60 people already rated this joke. Send this joke to a friend Start your day smiling with a funny joke by SMS. 15 Ways To Have Fun in a Hospital: 1. Hijack wheelchairs and speed around the hallways. 2. Get the rolling beds and race them, while the patients are still in them. 3. Go to the labor and delivery department, enter a room with a patient, and say "Breathe, breathe, breathe, DON'T BREATHE!" 4. Feed the diabetics lots and lots of sugar. 5. Start a food fight in the cafeteria. 6. Run around screaming, "YOU'RE ALL GONNA DIE! YOU'RE ALL GONNA DIE!" 7. Stand in a doorway with an IV filled with water and spray passing people. 8. Turn off the main power switch. 9. Start a war between all the patients and the nurses, and chase the nurses with syringes. 10. Flick the lights on and off in sleeping patients' rooms. 11. Go into another patient's room and page the nurse. Run away. Do it again, and again, and again. 12. Tell people there's a recreation center on the roof. When they get up there, look around and say, "Oh, it must be in the basement. Sorry." 13. Stand outside the door of the hospital and tell people it's closed but that it will open tomorrow at 8 am. 14. Steal old peoples' walkers. 15. Hijack an ambulance!! Rate the joke: 1 2 3 4 5 12 people already rated this joke. Send this joke to a friend Start your day smiling with a funny joke by SMS.