An Israeli soldier who just enlisted asked the ommanding Officer for a 3-day pass. The CO says "Are you crazy? You just joined the Israeli army, and you already want a 3-day pass? You must do something spectacular for that recognition!" So the soldier comes back a day later in an Arab tank! The CO was so impressed, he asked, "How did you do it?" "Well, I jumped in a tank, and went toward the border with the Arabs. I approached the border, and saw an Arab tank. I put my white flag up, the Arab tank put his white flag up. I said to the Arab soldier, "Do you want to get a three-day pass? So we exchanged tanks!" Rate the joke: 1 2 3 4 5 17 people already rated this joke. Send this joke to a friend Start your day smiling with a funny joke by SMS. A 54 year old accountant leaves a letter for his wife one evening... Dear Wife, I am 54 and by the time you receive this letter I will be at the Grand Bay Hotel with my beautiful and sexy 18 year old secretary." There was a letter waiting for him When he arrived at the hotel that read as follows... Dear Husband, I too am 54 and by the time you receive this letter I will be at the Park Hotel with my handsome and virile 18 year old boy. AND, you, being an accountant, will appreciate that 18 goes into 54 many more times than 54 goes into 18." Rate the joke: 1 2 3 4 5 631 people already rated this joke. Send this joke to a friend Start your day smiling with a funny joke by SMS. In a tiny village lived an old maid, she was still a virgin and very proud of it. She knew her last days were getting closer, so she told the local undertaker that she wanted the following inscription on her tombstone: "Born as a virgin, lived as a virgin, died as a virgin." Not long after, the old maid died peacefully, and the undertaker told his men what was the lady’s wish. The men went to carve it in, but as the lazy no-goods they were, they thought the inscription was too long, so they simply wrote: "Returned unopened." Rate the joke: 1 2 3 4 5 33 people already rated this joke. Send this joke to a friend Start your day smiling with a funny joke by SMS. A mother walks into her daughter’s room holding a condom in her hand, "I found this while cleaning your room today.... Are you sexually active?" To which the daughter replies, "No, I just lay there." Rate the joke: 1 2 3 4 5 13 people already rated this joke. Send this joke to a friend Start your day smiling with a funny joke by SMS.