The National Institutes of Health have announced
that they will no longer be using rats for medical
experimentation. In their place, they will use
attorneys. They have given three reasons for this decision:
1. There are now more attorneys than there are rats.
2. The medical researchers don't become as emotionally
attached to the attorneys as they did to the rats.
3. No matter how hard you try, there are some things
that rats won't do.