Things you would never know without the movies: All telephone numbers in America begin with the digits 555... The more a man and a woman hate each other, the more likely they will fall in love... All beds have special L-shaped cover sheets which reach up to the armpit level on a woman but only to waist level on the man lying beside her. The ventilation system of any building is the perfect hiding place. No one will ever think of looking for you in there and you can travel to any other part of the building you want without difficulty... When confronted by an evil international terrorist, sarcasm and wisecracks are your best weapons... Honest and hardworking policemen are traditionally gunned down three days before their retirement... Having a job of any kind will make a father forget his son's eighth birthday. Kitchens don't have light switches. At night, open the fridge door and use that light instead... When staying in a haunted house, women should investigate any strange noises in their most revealing underwear... Creepy music coming from a cemetery should always be investigated more closely... Any person waking from a nightmare will sit bolt upright and pant... A cough is usually the sign of a terminal illness... Most people keep a scrapbook of newspaper clippings, especially if any of their family or friends have died in a strange boating accident... If you are blonde and pretty, it is possible to become a world expert in Nuclear Fission at age 23. Rate the joke: 1 2 3 4 5 19 people already rated this joke. Send this joke to a friend Start your day smiling with a funny joke by SMS. Q: How many country singers does it take to replace a light bulb? A: Two, one to put in the light bulb and another to sing about how much he misses the old one. Rate the joke: 1 2 3 4 5 21 people already rated this joke. Send this joke to a friend Start your day smiling with a funny joke by SMS. Two drunks were driving down the road. The 1st drunk looked over to the other drunk and says, "I think we are getting closer to down town." The 2nd drunk says, "How can you tell?" 1st drunk says, "We're hitting more and more people." Rate the joke: 1 2 3 4 5 21 people already rated this joke. Send this joke to a friend Start your day smiling with a funny joke by SMS. Beauty is in the eye of the beer holder. Rate the joke: 1 2 3 4 5 117 people already rated this joke. Send this joke to a friend Start your day smiling with a funny joke by SMS.