The Rev. Dr. Jordan was anxious about his son's college examination and requested him to telegraph the results. The boy sent the following telegram, "Hymn 342, fifth verse, last two lines." Looking it up, the father found the words, "Sorrow vanished, labor ended, Jordan passed." Rate the joke: 1 2 3 4 5 29 people already rated this joke. Send this joke to a friend Start your day smiling with a funny joke by SMS. The Smith's were proud of their family tradition. Their ancestors had come to America on the Mayflower. They had included Senators and Wall Street wizards. They decided to compile a family history, a legacy for their children and grandchildren. They hired a fine author. Only one problem arose - how to handle that great-uncle George, who was executed in the electric chair. The author said he could handle the story tactfully. The book appeared. It said, "Great-uncle George occupied a chair of applied electronics at an important government institution, was attached to his position by the strongest of ties, and his death came as a great shock." Rate the joke: 1 2 3 4 5 18 people already rated this joke. Send this joke to a friend Start your day smiling with a funny joke by SMS. An American tourist in Tel Aviv was about to enter the impressive Mann Auditorium to take in a concert by the Israel Philharmonic. He was admiring the unique architecture, the sweeping lines of the entrance, and the modern decor throughout the building. Finally he turned to his escort and asked if the building was named for Thomas Mann, the world-famous author. "No," his friend said, "It's named for Fredric Mann, from Philadelphia." "Really? I never heard of him. What did he write?" -"A check." Rate the joke: 1 2 3 4 5 49 people already rated this joke. Send this joke to a friend Start your day smiling with a funny joke by SMS. REASONS WHY A HANDGUN IS BETTER THAN A WOMAN: 1. You can buy a silencer for a handgun. 2. You can trade a 44 for two 22's. 3. You can have a handgun at home and another for the road. 4. If you admire a friend's handgun and tell him so, he will be impressed and let you try a few rounds with it. 5. Your primary handgun doesn't mind if you have a backup. 6. Your handgun will stay with you even if you are out of ammo. 7. A handgun doesn't take up a lot of closet space. 8. Handguns function normally every day of the month. 9. A handgun does not mind if you go to sleep after you're done using it. Rate the joke: 1 2 3 4 5 22 people already rated this joke. Send this joke to a friend Start your day smiling with a funny joke by SMS.