After a hot, hard day's work Joe went into a bar to quench his thirst. He walked up to the bar and asked the bartender for a beer. The bartender replied "There's one thing every man has to do here before getting served. You have to tell me the name of your penis." Joe thought it was a bit silly and asked the bartender what he named his. The bartender said " I named mine Nike...like you know... just go for it!" So he thought about it for a few minutes then said " I got one... Secret." The bartender said "Why Secret?" Joe said "Well... it's strong enough for a man, but made for a woman." Rate the joke: 1 2 3 4 5 15 people already rated this joke. Send this joke to a friend Start your day smiling with a funny joke by SMS. This guy walks into a bar. It was on the second floor. He sits down and another guy walks up to him. He was dead drunk. He said, "I betcha I can jump out that thar winder and come right back up." The other guy said, "Yeah right." Well, the guy jumped out the window. "Oh my god, he actually did it," said the other guy. The drunk guy seemed to float right back up to the top. "How did you do that?" "Well, the air currents hitting the building slowly pushed me back up to the top, you wanna try it?" "Alright, get out of the way! AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH" SPLAT The drunk guy walked and sat down at the bar. The bartender said, "Damn it Superman, you're mean when you're drunk! Rate the joke: 1 2 3 4 5 28 people already rated this joke. Send this joke to a friend Start your day smiling with a funny joke by SMS. A man moves from Ireland to New York City, leaving two of his best friends behind to make it in America. To keep their tradition of nightly drinks alive, every night he goes into an Irish-style pub and orders three pints. The bartender, after a month of this, becomes curious, and asks the man what he's doing. Touched by the story, the bartender has the 3 pints ready for the man every time he comes in. One day, the man tells the bartender to only give him 2 pints. "My condolences," says the bartender, thinking that one of the man's friends has died. "No, no," says the man, "they're both still alive. I've just quit drinking." Rate the joke: 1 2 3 4 5 16 people already rated this joke. Send this joke to a friend Start your day smiling with a funny joke by SMS. A cowboy rode into town and stopped at a saloon for a drink. Unfortunately, the locals had a habit of picking on strangers. So when he finished his drink, he found his horse had been stolen. He went back into the bar, handily flipped his gun into the air, caught it above his head and fired a shot into the ceiling. ''WHICH ONE OF YOU SIDEWINDERS STOLE MY HOSS?'' he yelled. No one answered. ''ALL RIGHT, I'M GONNA HAVE ANOTHA' BEER, AND IF MY HOSS AIN'T BACK OUTSIDE BY THE TIME I FINISH, I'M GONNA DO WHAT I DONE IN TEXAS! AND I DON'T LIKE TO HAVE TO DO WHAT I DONE IN TEXAS!'' Some of the locals shifted restlessly. The cowboy had another beer, walked outside, and his horse was back! He saddled up and started to ride out of town. The bartender wandered out of the bar and asked, ''Say partner, before you go. . .what happened in Texas?'' The cowboy turned back and said, ''I had to walk home.'' Rate the joke: 1 2 3 4 5 19 people already rated this joke. Send this joke to a friend Start your day smiling with a funny joke by SMS.