there was a man travelling on a plane on a business trip who was desperate for the toilet but every time he went to the mens toilets it was occupied. the air attendant say how much he was suffering, so she said that he could use the womens toilets, but she warned him not to touch the buttons, but being a man he touch the buttons. he pressed the button with WW and warm water sprinkled on his bottom, then he pressed WA then warm air dryed his bottom, then he pressed PP and a powder puff sprinkled talcom powder on his bottom, by this time he was thinking women had it made, then there was one button left, ATR he pressed it!!! next thing he woke up in hospital we asked what was going on he said i just remember pressing the ATR button and the woman doctor said do you know what ATR stands for! HE SAID NO! she said Automatic Tampon Remover!! Rate the joke: 1 2 3 4 5 120 people already rated this joke. Send this joke to a friend Start your day smiling with a funny joke by SMS. Teacher: "Matt, if your father has $5, and he gives you how many dollars does he have?" Matt: "5$" Teacher: "Matt, you don't know your math!" Matt: "You don't know my father!" Rate the joke: 1 2 3 4 5 27 people already rated this joke. Send this joke to a friend Start your day smiling with a funny joke by SMS. One day in Sunday school, the teacher was giving the class a lesson about stories with morals. "Now," said the teacher, "does anyone have a story with a moral they would like to share with the class?" Little Jenny raised her hand and the teacher asked her to tell her story. She said, "Once upon a time there was a little girl who had to take some eggs to her grandmother. She put them all in a basket, but on the way there, she dropped the basket, and all the eggs broke, and her grandma didn't get any eggs!" "And what is the moral of your story?" asked the teacher. Jenny said, "Don't put all of your eggs in one basket." "That was very good, Jenny", said the teacher. "Who else has a story?" Another little girl raised her hand. "Go on, Emma, tell your story," said the teacher. Emma stood up and said, "Well, once there was a lady who raised chickens on a farm. Her chickens laid a dozen eggs, and she planned to sell all the chicks that came from them, but when they hatched, she only got ten live chickens to sell. And the moral of my story is, "Don't count your chickens until they're hatched." The little girl sat back down and Johnny raised his hand. "Let's hear your story, Johnny," said the teacher. Johnny stood up and said, "Well, my Uncle Frank was a helicopter pilot in Vietnam. One day his chopper got shot at and he knew he was going down over enemy territory. All he had on board was a bottle of whisky, a machine gun and a machete. So he grabbed them all and bailed out. He drank the whiskey on the way down and then he landed right smack dab in the middle of an enemy village." "He looked up and saw a hundred of the enemy all around him, all armed with knives and ready to kill him! Well, he killed seventy of them with the machine gun until he ran out of bullets, then he killed twenty-five more with the machete, then the blade broke and then he killed the last five with his bare hands!" "Good heavens," said the teacher, "That's umm... quite a story. But what kind of moral could that have?" Johnny said, "Don't mess with Uncle Frank when he's been drinking!" Rate the joke: 1 2 3 4 5 68 people already rated this joke. Send this joke to a friend Start your day smiling with a funny joke by SMS. Q: Why is 6 afraid of 7? A: because 7 8 9 (7 ate 9) Rate the joke: 1 2 3 4 5 194 people already rated this joke. Send this joke to a friend Start your day smiling with a funny joke by SMS.