The pretty teacher was concerned with one of her young students so she took him aside after class one day. "Little Johnny, why has your school work been so poor lately?" "I'm in love" replied Little Johnny. Holding back an urge to smile, the teacher asked, "With whom?" "With you!" he said. "But Little Johnny," said the teacher gently, "don't you see how silly that is? Sure I'd like a husband of my own someday... but I don't want a child." "Oh, don't worry," said Little Johnny reassuringly, "I'll use a rubber!" Rate the joke: 1 2 3 4 5 100 people already rated this joke. Send this joke to a friend Start your day smiling with a funny joke by SMS. A lady went to her doctor for a check-up. when asked how she got the bruises on the outside of her thighs, she explained that she got them from having sex. The doctor then told her she would have to change positions until the bruises healed. She replied "Oh doctor, I can't... my dog's breath is awful!" Rate the joke: 1 2 3 4 5 49 people already rated this joke. Send this joke to a friend Start your day smiling with a funny joke by SMS. A five-year-old boy was mowing his front lawn and drinking a beer. The preacher who lived across the street saw the beer and came over to harass the kid. "Aren't you a little young to be drinking, son?" he asked. "That's nothing," the kid said after taking a swig of beer. "I got laid when I was three." "What? How did that happen?" "I don't remember. I was drunk." Rate the joke: 1 2 3 4 5 27 people already rated this joke. Send this joke to a friend Start your day smiling with a funny joke by SMS. One day an old farmer fell asleep in the top level in a 2 level hay shed. When he woke up, he found his son having sex with his girlfriend on the bottom level of the hayshed. He decided he wouldn't disturb them, so he laid down and rested. After a while he heard his son say, "Father, father up above. Give me strength for one last shove." So the father, being smart, replied, "Son, son down below. Get off and give your father a go." Rate the joke: 1 2 3 4 5 34 people already rated this joke. Send this joke to a friend Start your day smiling with a funny joke by SMS.