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Q: What does Bill Clinton say to Hillary Clinton after having sex?
A: "I will be home in 20 minutes, dear."



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A man was out of town on business. While sitting around his hotel he became bored. So he
thought to himself, "Hmm, a beer would be really nice right now." So he began to wander
the streets of the unfamiliar city, looking for a bar. And, after a few minutes he came
across one. He casually went inside and took a seat at the bar.
The bartender walks up and asks the man what he is drinking. Anxiously, the man says, "Bud
Light please."

The bartender then asked what the name of his penis was. The man looked at him with
confusion and said, "What are you talking about? All I want is a Bud Light and, besides, I
have no name for my penis."

The bartender, calming the man, said, "Look around, all you see is men. That is because
this is a gay bar. And the tradition is, when you order a drink, you state the name of
your penis. Then I'll serve you a drink."
The man, really thirsty for a beer, now says, "Fine. Give me couple of minutes to think,
and I'll order when I come up with something."
So he is thinking about it for a couple of minutes and still can't come up with anything.
So he decides to ask the guy next to him for an idea. The man states, in a feminine voice,
"Well I call mine Timex, because it takes a lickin' and keeps on tickin."
The man quickly turns away and asks another man to his right. That man states in a deep,
gruff voice, "I call my Ford, because it is built ram tough. Have you driven a Ford
lately?"
Again, the man quickly turns away. Then, suddenly he says, "Bartender, come here, I am
ready to order."
The bartender says, "What'll ya have?"
The man says, "A Bud Light please."
The bartender asks, "What is the name of your penis?"
The man responds, "Secret... strong enough for a man but made for a woman."


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What's the difference between men and beer?
When you're done with the beer it's still worth 5 cents


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A newly married man was discussing his honeymoon. He says to his buddy at lunch, "Last
night, I rolled over, tapped my beautiful young wife on the shoulder, gave her a wink, and
we had ourselves a performance! Later that night, about 2 o'clock, I rolled over, gave my
sweetie a nudge, and we had ourselves another performance. Well, being so newly married
and not yet tired of the task, I waited quietly in bed while my beauty slept until I
couldn't wait any longer. It was 4 o'clock when I gave her a little nudge. She opened her
blue eyes and smiled sweetly. We immediately had ourselves a rehearsal."
"A rehearsal?" his buddy asks, "Don't you mean a performance?"

"No, because a rehearsal is when nobody comes."






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