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Don't Say The following During Sex:
1.But everybody looks funny naked!
2.You woke me up for that?
3.Did I mention the video camera?
4.Do you smell something burning?
5.(In a janitor's closet) And they
say romance is dead...
6.Try breathing through your nose.
7.A little rug burn never hurt anyone!
8.Is that a Medic-Alert Pendant?
9.Sweetheart, did you lock the back door?
10.But whipped cream makes me break out.
11.Person 1: This is your first time...right?
Person 2: Yeah...today.
12.Hurry up! This room rents by the hour!


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One day the sheriff sees Billy-Bob
walking around town with nothing on
except his gun belt and his boots.
The sheriff says, "Billy-Bob, what
the hell are you doing walking around
town dressed like that?"
Billy-Bob replies, "Well sheriff,
it's a long story!"
Sheriff says that he isn't in a hurry
and that Billy-Bob should tell the story.
Billy-Bob continues, "Well sheriff,
me and Mary-Lou were down on the farm
and we started a cuddling. Mary-Lou
said we should go in the barn and we did.
Inside the barn we stated a kissing
and a cuddling and things got pretty
hot and heavy, well Mary-Lou said that
we should go up on the hill. So we did.
Up on the hill we started a kissing and
a cuddling and then Mary-Lou took off
all her clothes and said that I should
do the same.
Well, I took off all my clothes except
my gun belt and my boots.
Then Mary-Lou lay on the ground and
opened her legs and said "Billy-Bob, go to town"



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Ingredients:
2 whole nuts
1 large banana
2 strong arms
2 well shaped legs
1 fur lined mixing bowl
4 loving eyes.
Mixing instructions: Look into eyes, part legs.
Gently squeeze milk jugs. Continue until bowl
is well greased. Add banana, top with nuts.
Move in and out until cake is well creamed.
Sigh with relief, let cool. Do not lick the bowl.
If cake starts to rise, get out of town FAST!



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Adam and Eve were standing opposite to
each other when Adam got his first erection.
The two watched, astonished, until Adam
suddenly exclaimed: “Move aside - I don't
know how far its gonna go.”



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