An obnoxious drunk in a bar keeps hitting on a lesbian who is waiting for her date. The drunk just won't take no for an answer. "Tell you what, I'll sleep with you if you can name one thing a man can do for me that my vibrator can't!" the lesbian smirks. The obnoxious drunk thinks for a moment. "Okay, let's see your vibrator buy the next round of drinks!" Rate the joke: 1 2 3 4 5 445 people already rated this joke. Send this joke to a friend Start your day smiling with a funny joke by SMS. A blonde is walking down the street with her blouse open and her right breast hanging out. A policeman approaches her and says: "Ma'am, are you aware that I could cite you for indecent exposure?" She says, "Why, officer?" "Because your breast is hanging out." She looks down and says: "OH MY GOODNESS! I left the baby on the train again!" Rate the joke: 1 2 3 4 5 710 people already rated this joke. Send this joke to a friend Start your day smiling with a funny joke by SMS. A woman says to her husband that she wants to have plastic surgery to enlarge her breasts. Her husband tells her, "Hey, you don't need surgery to do that. I know how to do it without surgery." She asks:" How do I do it without surgery?" Her husband answers, "Just rub toilet paper between them." "How does that make them bigger?", she asks. "I don't know, but it certainly worked for your ass." Rate the joke: 1 2 3 4 5 11 people already rated this joke. Send this joke to a friend Start your day smiling with a funny joke by SMS. A recently married minister went to his congregation, informed them of his wife's pregnancy and asked for a raise that would allow him a reasonable salary. After deliberation it was agreed that the increase in family size warranted the raise. After six births in six years the congregants called a meeting to complain that the cost was becoming burdensome. Things got contentious. Finally, the minister stood at the altar and said, a little angrily, "Having children is an act of God!" "Snow and rain are acts of God, too," a man at the back of the room said, "but most of us wear rubbers." Rate the joke: 1 2 3 4 5 58 people already rated this joke. Send this joke to a friend Start your day smiling with a funny joke by SMS.