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A minister was asked to pull over by a traffic cop.
As the cop was about to write the speeding ticket,
the minister said to him, "Blessed are the merciful,
for they shall obtain mercy."
The cop handed the minister the ticket and said, "Go
thou and sin no more."


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A Lutheran minister is driving down
to New York to see the radio show and
he's stopped in Connecticut for speeding.
The state trooper smells alcohol on his
breath and then he sees an empty wine
bottle on the floor, and he says, "Sir,
have you been drinking?" And the minister
says, "Just water." The sheriff says,
"Then why do I smell wine?" And the
minister looks down at the bottle and
says, "Good Lord, He's done it again!"


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A visiting cantor was invited to sing traditional
Jewish songs at a Marlboro synagogue. After the
services he was bragging that Lloyd's of London
has insured his voice for $750,000.00 to members
of the congregation. Mrs. Siegel, an older lady,
said, "So cantor, what did you do with the money?"


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There were these two priests who rode bikes to church every Sunday.
Well one day one of the priests showed up to work without his bike.
The other priest asked where his bike was. The priest said,
"I don't know, but I think it got stolen!"
The other priest said, "Well what you do is read off the ten commandments,
and when you get to ‘Thou Shall Not Steal' someone will confess to the crime."
The next time the two saw each other the priest had his bicycle back.
"I see you got your bike back!
Did you do what I said?," asked the priest.
"Well kind of" replied the other "when I was reading the commandments and I
got to Thou Shall Not Commit Adultery, I remembered where I had left it."


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