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Why did the blonde jump off the Empire State Building?

She thought her pad had wings!!!



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What do you call 12 blondes in a tree?

A cunt-tree.



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Two bored casino dealers were waiting at a craps table. A very
attractive blonde woman arrived and bet twenty thousand dollars
on a single roll of the dice.

She said, "I hope you don't mind, but I feel much
luckier when I'm completely nude."

With that she stripped from her neck down, rolled the
dice and yelled, "Mama needs new clothes!"

Then she hollered..."YES! YES! I WON! I WON!" She
jumped up and down and hugged each of the dealers.

She then picked up all the money and clothes and
quickly departed.

The dealers just stared at each other dumbfounded.

Finally, one of them asked, "What did she roll?"

The other answered, "I don't know, I thought YOU were
watching!"

Moral: Not all blondes are dumb, but all men are men



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A policeman was interrogating 3 blondes who were training to
become detectives. To test their skills in recognizing a
suspect, he shows the first blonde a picture for 5 seconds and
then hides it. "This is your suspect, how would you recognize
him?" The first blonde answers, "That's easy, we'll catch
him fast because he only has one eye!"The Policeman
says, "Well...uh...that's because the picture shows his profile."

Slightly flustered by this ridiculous response, he flashes the
picture for 5 seconds at the second blonde and asks her, "This
is your suspect, how would you recognize him?" The second blonde
giggles, flips her hair and says,"Ha! He'd be too easy to catch
because he only has one ear!" The policeman angrily
responds, "What's the matter with you two?!? Of course only one
eye and one ear are SHOWING because it's a picture of his
profile!! Is that the best answer you can come up with?

Extremely frustrated at this point, he shows the picture to the
third blonde and in a very testy voice asks, "This is your
suspect, how would you recognize him?" He quickly adds "...think
hard before giving me a stupid answer." The blonde looks at the
picture intently for a moment and says, "Hmmmm...the suspect
wears contact lenses." The policeman is surprised and speechless
because he really doesn't know himself if the suspect wears
contacts or not. "Well, that's an interesting answer...wait here
for a few minutes while I check his file and I'll get back to
you on that." He leaves the room and goes to his office, checks
the suspect's file in his computer, and comes back with a
beaming smile on his face. "Wow! I can't believe it...it's TRUE!
The suspect does in fact wear contact lenses. Good work!

How were you able to make such an astute observation? "That's
easy," the blonde replied. "He can't wear regular glasses
because he only has one eye and one ear."



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