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One day, a blonde's neighbor goes over
to her house, sees the blonde crying,
and asks her what happened.
The blonde said that her mother had passed away.
The neighbor made her some coffee and
calmed her down a little and then left.
The next day the neighbor went back over
to the house and found the blonde crying again.
She asked her why she was crying this time.
"I just got off of the phone with my
sister, her mother died too!"


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There is a blonde on a plane to New York.
She is sitting in the first class section,
but her ticket says that she should be
in the coach section. A flight attendant
realizes the blonde's mistake and asks
her politely to move. The blonde won't move.
All she says is, "I'm blonde, I'm beautiful,
and I'm going to New York."
The flight attendant goes and tells all
of the other flight attendants. They all
try to persuade the blonde to move, but
she won't move. All she says is, "I'm blonde,
I'm beautiful, and I'm going to New York."
The flight attendants go and tell the pilot
about the obnoxious blonde. They tell him
the only thing that she says. He puts the
plane on auto-pilot and whispers something
in the blonde's ear.
Immediately, she gets up and moves to her
normal seat. Then the pilot goes back to
fly the plane. The flight attendants are
all very curious about how the pilot made
the blonde move so quickly.
They ask him and he says, "Oh, it was easy.
All i had to do was tell her that the first
class section wasn't going to New York!"



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A blonde suspects that her
boyfriend is cheating on her,
so she goes out and buys a gun.
She goes to his apartment that
same day, with the gun in hand.
Sure enough, when she opens
the door, she finds her boyfriend
in the arms of a redhead.
She points the gun at her
boyfriend at stares him down
for a moment.
Then, suddenly, she's overcome
with grief, so she puts the
gun up to the side her head.
Her boyfriend screams, "Honey, don't do it..."
The blonde yells back, "Shut up! You're next!"



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A blonde walks up to a Coke
machine and puts in a coin.
Out pops a Coke.
The blonde looks amazed and
runs away to get some more coins.
She returns and starts feeding
the machine madly and of course
the machine keeps feeding out drinks.
Another person walks up behind
the blonde and watches her
antics for a few minutes before
stopping her and asking if someone
else could have a go.
The blonde turns around and
shouts, "Can't you see I'm winning!"



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