Two flies walk into a bar and order drinks and start talking. The first fly says how was your travel down here? The second fly answers "it was cold I rode in a bikers mustache. How was yours? The first fly answers I was warm I rode in a biker chicks' pussy. You ought to do it next year. So a year passes and the same two flies met in the same bar, and the first fly says did you do it? And the second fly answers yes but some how I still showed up in a biker's mustache. Rate the joke: 1 2 3 4 5 11 people already rated this joke. Send this joke to a friend Start your day smiling with a funny joke by SMS. During an auction of exotic pets, a woman who had placed a winning bid say to the auctioneer, "I'm paying a fortune for that parrot. I hope he talks as well as you say he does." "I guarantee it, madam," replied the auctioneer. "Who do you think was bidding against you?" Rate the joke: 1 2 3 4 5 17 people already rated this joke. Send this joke to a friend Start your day smiling with a funny joke by SMS. Once there were two men walking down the street. One of them said "Hey is that dog poop?" The other guy said "Hey why don't you touch it." "Yep , feels like dog poop" Well why don't you smell it." "Yep smells like dog poop." "Why dont you taste it" "Yep tastes like dog poop." "Well good thing we didn't step in it." Rate the joke: 1 2 3 4 5 16 people already rated this joke. Send this joke to a friend Start your day smiling with a funny joke by SMS. For months he had been her devoted admirer. Now, at long last, he had collected up sufficient courage to ask her the most momentous of all questions. "There are quite a lot of advantages to being a bachelor," he began, "but there comes a time when one longs for the companionship of another being...a being who will regard one as perfect, as an idol ;whom one can treat as one's absolute property; who will be kind and faithful when times are hard; who will share one's joys and sorrows... " To his delight he saw a sympathetic gleam in her eyes. Then she nodded in agreement. She replied, "I think its a great idea... I would love to help you choose your pet dog." Rate the joke: 1 2 3 4 5 581 people already rated this joke. Send this joke to a friend Start your day smiling with a funny joke by SMS.