George used to come home very late and very drunk. His wife decided to ýteach him a lesson, so she dressed up like Satan and hid in the dark to scare ýhim when he got home. ý When he finally came stumbling across the lawn, his wife jumped out in front ýof him and howled. He just looked at her and slurred, "You don't scare me; ýI'm married to your sister!"ý Rate the joke: 1 2 3 4 5 119 people already rated this joke. Send this joke to a friend Start your day smiling with a funny joke by SMS. Wife: "You know, honey, without your glasses you look like the same ýhandsome young man I married." ý Husband: "Honey without my glasses, you still look pretty good too!"ý Rate the joke: 1 2 3 4 5 14 people already rated this joke. Send this joke to a friend Start your day smiling with a funny joke by SMS. A police officer in a small town stopped a motorist who was speeding down Main Street. ý Motorist: "But officer, I can explain." ý Officer: "Just be quiet, or I'm going to let you cool off in jail until the chief gets back!" ý Motorist: "But officer, I just wanted to say...." ý Officer: "And I said keep quiet! Now you're going to jail!" ý A few hours later, the officer checked up on his prisoner,ý Officer:"lucky for you that the chief's at his daughter's wedding. He'll be in a good mood when he ýgets back." ý Motorist: "Don't count on it, I'm the groom." ý Rate the joke: 1 2 3 4 5 10 people already rated this joke. Send this joke to a friend Start your day smiling with a funny joke by SMS. An 90 year old man came to his doctor and asked for "a half dose of Viagra." His doctor asked, "Why only a half a dose?" He replied, "I only need enough to stop peeing on my shoes!" Rate the joke: 1 2 3 4 5 105 people already rated this joke. Send this joke to a friend Start your day smiling with a funny joke by SMS.