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A man came home from work after
a horrible day at the office.
His wife has complained to him
over and over that he never
notices her anymore, and he
denied it. When he comes through
the door his wife greets him
and says, "Hi, Honey. Notice
anything different about me today?"
"Oh, I don't know. You got
your hair done."
"Nope, try again."
"Oh, uh, you bought a new dress."
"Nope, keep trying."
"You got your nails done."
"Nope, try again."
"I give up, I'm too tired to
play 20 questions."
"I'm wearing a gas mask!"


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Q: What starts with E, ends with
E and only has one letter?
A: An envelope.


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Q: What happened when 500 hares
got loose on the main street?
A: The police had to comb the area.


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This priest was hearing a woman's
confession when a drunk stumbled
into the booth on the opposite side.
As the priest was finishing with
her he heard the drunk groaning
as if in quite some pain. He slid
open the other panel and asked,
"Are you ok?" All he heard was
another groan. He asked again and
the drunk finally replied, "Yeah,
I feel lots better. Do you have
any toilet paper on your side?"


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