In a traffic court of a large Midwestern city, a young lady was brought before the judge to answer for a ticket given her for driving through a red light. She explained to his honor that she was a schoolteacher and requested an immediate disposal of her case so she could get to the school on time. A wild gleam came into the judge's eye. "You're a schoolteacher, eh?" he said. "Madam, I shall realize my lifelong ambition. I've waited years to have a school teacher in this court. Sit down at that table and write, 'I went through a red light' 500 times!" Rate the joke: 1 2 3 4 5 19 people already rated this joke. Send this joke to a friend Start your day smiling with a funny joke by SMS. A man who had just undergone a very complicated operation kept complaining about a bump on his head and a terrible headache. Since his operation had been an intestinal one, there was no earthly reason why he should be complaining of a headache. Finally his nurse, fearing that the man might be suffering from some post-operative shock, spoke to the doctor about it. The doctor assured the nurse, "Don't worry about a thing. He really does have a bump on his head. About halfway through the operation we ran out of anesthetic." Rate the joke: 1 2 3 4 5 29 people already rated this joke. Send this joke to a friend Start your day smiling with a funny joke by SMS. There was a young man who volunteered for military service during World War II. He had such a high aptitude for aviation that he was sent right to Pensacola skipping boot camp. The very first day at Pensacola he solos and is the best flier on the base. All they could do was give him his gold wings and assign him immediately to an aircraft carrier in the Pacific. On his first day aboard he took off and single-handedly shot down 6 Japanese Zeroes. Then climbing up to 20,000 ft., he found 9 more Japanese planes and shot them all down, too. Noting that his fuel was getting low, he descended, circled the carrier and came in for a perfect landing on the deck. He threw back the canopy, climbed out and jogged over to the captain. Saluting smartly he said, "Well sir, how did I do on my very first day?" The captain turned around, bowed, and replied, "You make one velly impoltant mistake!" Rate the joke: 1 2 3 4 5 29 people already rated this joke. Send this joke to a friend Start your day smiling with a funny joke by SMS. Q: How many graduate students does it take to screw in a light bulb? A: Only one, but it may take upwards of five years for him to get it done. Rate the joke: 1 2 3 4 5 103 people already rated this joke. Send this joke to a friend Start your day smiling with a funny joke by SMS.