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Why is psychoanalysis a lot quicker for a man then for a woman? Because when it's time to
go back to childhood, he's already there. 



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Mary had a little lamb & tied it to a pylon, a 1000 volts shot up its ass & turned it into
nylon



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I think drinking and driving is terrible. You always spill it when you change gears…



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My parents were so poor, they got married for the rice.



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