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The jury selection process.
George was called for his question session.
Judge: "Property holder?"
George: "Yes, I am, Your Honor."
Judge: "Married or single?"
George: "Married for twenty years, Your Honor."
Judge: "Formed or expressed an opinion?"
George: "Not in twenty years, Your Honor."


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A cowboy rides into town and stops at the saloon,
gets off his horse walks around to the back of it,
lifts up the tail and kisses it smack on the ass.
The bartender inside the bar notices this transaction.
Bartender: "I noticed when you got off your horse you
walked behind it and kissed it on the ass. Can I ask why?"
Cowboy: "Chapped lips".
Bartender: "Wow! It cures chapped lips?"
Cowboy: "No, but it sure as hell keeps you from
licking them."


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John approached a very beautiful woman in a supermarket.
John: "You know, I've lost my wife here in the supermarket.
Can you talk to me for a couple of minutes?"
Woman: "Why?".
John: "Because every time I talk to a a beautiful woman,
my wife appears out of nowhere."


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The average blue whale male produces over 400 gallons
of sperm when it ejaculates, but only 10% of that
actually makes it into his mate.
So 360 gallons are spilled into the ocean every time
one unloads, and you wonder why the ocean is so salty...


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