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Two atoms are walking down the street and they run
into each other.
First atom: "Are you all right?".
Second atom: "No, I lost an electron!"
First atom: "Are you sure?"
Second atom: "Yeah, I'm positive!"


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John: "Doc, I keep having these alternating recurring
dreams."
Doctor: "Go on.."
John: "First I'm a tepee, then I'm a wigwam,
then I'm a tepee, then I'm a wigwam. It's driving me crazy.
Doctor: "It's very simple. You're two tents."


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When blue collar workers go out together on a weekend
they talk about football.
When middle management are together,
they talk about tennis.
Top management discusses golf.
Conclusion: The higher up you are in management,
the smaller your balls.


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A drunk staggered into a Catholic church
and ended up in the confession booth.
Priest: "What do you need my son?"
Drunk: "Is there any paper on your side?"


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