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Johny: "Momma, can i play with Grandma and Grandpa ?".

Mother: "Will you stop digging them up!!?"



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When Little Johnny got his exam paper back,
he saw a big red F staring back at him.
Billy: "Why did you get such a low mark on that test?"
Johnny: "Because of an absence,".
Billy: "You mean you were absent on the day of the test?".
Johnny: "I wasn't, but the kid who sits next to me was."



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In the park there were two statues.
One day God said to the statues: "you have
ten minutes to do anything you want".
So one statue said to the other: "hold the bird down
while I shit on his head"


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A woman walked up to a little old man rocking
in a chair on his porch.
Woman: "I couldn't help noticing how happy you look."
"What's your secret to a long, happy life?"
Man: "I smoke three packs of cigarettes a day,
and I also drink a case of whiskey a week, eat fatty foods,
and never exercise."
Woman: "That's amazing, how old are you?'
Man: "Twenty-six,"



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