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I sent flowers to someone who was
moving to Florida for a job promotion.
I also sent flowers the same day to
a funeral for a friend.
I found out later that the flower
shop got the cards mixed up. They
sent the card to the guy who was
moving that said, "Deepest Condolences,"
and sent the card to the funeral home
that said, "I know it's hot where
you're going, but you deserve it."


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A teacher took her class on a nature
trail through the woods. He stopped
by a tree and said, "Brian, can you
tell me what the outer part of a tree
is called?"
"I don't know, sir," said Brian.
"ark, boy, bark!" said the teacher.
"Ok, sir" said Brian "Woof! Woof!"


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Policeman: "I'm afraid that I'm going
to have to lock you up for the night."
Man: "What's the charge officer?"
Policeman: "Oh, there's no charge.
It's all part of the service.


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A man was found murdered in
his home over the weekend.
Detectives at the scene found
the man face down in his tub.
The tub had been filled with
milk, and the deceased had a
banana protruding from his buttocks.
Police suspect a cereal killer.


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