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A new bride went to her doctor for a check up.

Lacking knowledge of the male anatomy, she asked the doctor, "What's that thing hanging
between my husbands legs?"

The doctor replies, "We call that the penis."

The new bride then asks, "What's that reddish/purple thing on the end of the penis?"

The doctor replies, "We call that the head of the penis.

The bride then asks, "What are those 2 round things about 15 inches from the head of the
penis?"

The doctor replies, "Lady, on him I don't know, but on me they're the cheeks of my ass!"


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Nuns ran an orphanage for girls in a rural part of Georgia.

One day, the Mother Superior called in 3 teenage girls who were about to leave and seek
their way in life.

'You have led a very sheltered life and you are going into an extremely sinful world,' she
said.

'I must warn you that men will take advantage of you. They'll do anything to get their
way.

They'll take you to restaurants, buy you drinks and dinner, then back to their apartments
and motels where they'll undress you, do terrible things, give you twenty or thirty
dollars and kick you out.'

'Excuse me, Mother,' one of the girls asked. 'You mean men will take advantage of us and
give us cash?'

'Yes child, why do you ask?'

'Because the priests only give us candy!'


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Arnold Schwarzenegger has a big one.

Michael J. Fox has a small one.

Madonna doesn't have one.

The Pope has one but doesn't use it.

The Artist Formerly Known as Prince won't admit that he has one.

Clinton uses his all the time.

What is it?

Answer: A LAST NAME!



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A man who just got a raise decides to buy a new scope for his rifle.

He goes to a gun shop, and asks the clerk to show him a scope.

The clerk takes out a scope, and says to the man, "This scope is so good, you can see my
house all the way up on that hill."

The man takes a look through the scope, and starts laughing.

"What's so funny?" asks the clerk.

"I see a naked man and a naked woman running around in the house," the man replies.

The clerk grabs the scope from the man, and looks at his house.

Then he hands two bullets to the man and says, "Here are two bullets, I'll give you this
scope for nothing if you take these two bullets, shoot my wife's head off and shoot the
guy's dick off."

The man takes another look through the scope, and says, "You know what? I think I can do
that with one shot!"




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