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The teacher of the earth science class was lecturing on map reading.

After explaining about latitude, longitude, degrees and minutes the teacher asked,
"Suppose I asked you to meet me for lunch at 23 degrees, 4 minutes north latitude and 45
degrees, 15 minutes east longitude...?"

After a confused silence, a voice volunteered, "I guess you'd be eating alone."


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Answers to Questions on Science Tests
By 5th and 6th graders:

The spinal column is a long bunch of bones. The head sits on the top, and you sit on the
bottom.

A city purifies its water supply by filtering the water and then forcing it through an
aviator.

The inhabitants of Moscow are Mosquitoes.

It is so hot in some places that people there have to live in other places.

Momentum is something you give a person when they go away.

Mushrooms always grow in damp places which is why they look like umbrellas.

The four seasons are salt, pepper, mustard and vinegar.

The alimentary canal is located in the northern part of Indiana.

Thunder is a rich source of loudness.

Some people can tell what time it is by looking at the sun, but I never have been able to
make out the numbers.

In some rocks you can find the fossil footprints of fishes.

When planets run around and around in circles, we say they are orbiting. When people do
it, we say they are crazy.

One of the main causes of dust is janitors.

For asphyxiation, apply artificial respiration until the victim is dead.

Blood circulates through the body by flowing down one leg and up the other.

A monsoon is a French gentleman.

The word "trousers" is an uncommon noun because it is singular at the top and plural at
the bottom.

Rain is saved up in cloud banks.

To keep milk from turning sour, keep it in the cow.

Genetics explains why you look like your father, and if you don't, why you should.

Water vapor gets together in a big cloud. When it gets big enough to be called a drop, it
does.

There is a tremendous weight pushing down on the center of the Earth because so many
people are stomping around there these days.

The cause of perfume disappearing is evaporation. Evaporation gets blamed for a lot of
things people forget to put the top on.

You can listen to thunder and tell how close you came to getting hit. If you don't hear
it, you got hit, so never mind.


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While my wife and I were shopping at a mall, a shapely young woman in a short,
form-fitting dress strolled by. My eyes
followed her.

Without looking up from the item she was examining, my wife asked, "Was it worth the
trouble you're in?"


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An old man was laying on his death bed. With only hours to live, he suddenly noticed the
scent of chocolate chip cookies coming from the kitchen.

With his last bit of energy, the old man pulled himself out from his bed, across the floor
to the stairs, and down the stairs to the kitchen.

There, the old man's wife was baking chocolate chip cookies. With his last ounce of
energy, the old man reached for a cookie.

His wife, however, quickly smacked him across the back of his hand, and exclaimed, "Leave
them alone, they're for the funeral!"


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