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Democrats are concerned about President Bush's Supreme Court nominee John Roberts.

They think he may be a threat to the endangered species list... Democrats, of course, have
been worried about the endangered species list since they found out they were on it.

-Jay Leno


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Some sad news... King Fahd has died and in respect, the Saudi family lowered the flag and
raised oil prices.

-Jay Leno


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Q. What do you call a dear without any eyes?

A. No eye dear!


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For a couple years I've been blaming it on lack of sleep, too much pressure from my job,
earwax buildup, poor blood, but now I found out the real reason:

I'm tired because I'm overworked.

Here's why:

The population of the USA is about 273 million.

140 million are retired.

That leaves 133 million to do the work.

There are 85 million in school.

Which leaves 48 million to do the work.

Of this there are 29 million employed by the federal government.

Leaving 19 million to do the work.

2.8 million are in the armed forces.

Which leaves 16.2 million to do the work.

Take from the total the 14,800,000 people who work for state and city governments.

And that leaves 1.4 million to do the work.

At any given time there are 188,000 people in hospitals,

Leaving 1,212,000 to do the work.

Now, there are 1,211,998 people in prisons.

That leaves just two people to do all the work.

You and me, and you're sitting on your rear, at your computer, reading jokes!



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