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Shit , Shut up and Manners are the names of 3 blond guy's.
They all went in a jeep to the town's Main Street,
Shit fell off the Jeep and Shut up went to the police to testify
The police officer said: "what's your name?"
A: Shut up.
The police officer said "i'm asking you one more time
what's your name?"
A: Shut up!
The police officer asked :where are your manners??
A: Oh picking up Shit at Main Street.


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Q: If "CON" is the opposite of "PRO",
what is the opposite of PROGRESS?
A: congress.


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Q: Why were the little strawberries upset?
A: Because their parents were in a jam!


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Q: Why seagulls are called seagulls?
A: Because if they flew over the bay,
they'd be called bagels!


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A policeman pulled alongside a speeding car on
the crowded freeway. Glancing at the car, the
officer was astounded to see that the young blonde
woman behind the wheel was knitting.
Conceding that she was oblivious to his flashing
lights and siren, the trooper cranked down his window,
turned on his bullhorn and yelled, "Pull over!"
"NO," the blonde woman yelled back. "It's a scurf!"


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Q: why did the washing machine laugh?
A: Because it taking the piss out of the pants.


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Q: What did the traffic light say to the bus?
A: Don't look i am changing.


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A man at a nursing home took Viagra and went to the lunch room,
where the residents were playing Bingo. To get their attention
he yelled out, "SUPER SEX!, Super Sex!"
The ladies yelled back: "I want the SOUP!", "Soup, Please."
"Oh, I'd love some soup!"


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Q: What's the difference between tampons and cowboy hats?
A: Cowboy hats are for ass holes.


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One brith sunny morning there were three men.
Their names were 'Manners','Trouble' and
'Hushyourmouth'.
One day Trouble lost and Manners and Hushyourmouth
went to the police station.
Manners stand outside and Hushyourmouth went
to the police.
The police ask him "What is your name?"
He said: "Hushyourmouth."
The police ask him: "Do you have manners?"
He said: "Yes, he's outside."
"Oh, you are looking for trouble."
He said "of course"


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