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To tell the weather, go to your back door and look for the dog.
If the dog is at the door and he is wet, it's probably raining.
But if the dog is standing there really soaking wet, it is probably raining really hard.
If the dog's fur looks like it's been rubbed the wrong way, it's probably windy.
If the dog has snow on his back, it's probably snowing.
Of course, to be able to tell the weather like this, you have to
leave the dog outside all the time, especially if you expect bad weather.
Sincerely,
The Cat



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An elephant and a crocodile were swimming
in the Amazon, when the elephant spots a
turtle sunning himself on a rock.
The elephant walks over to the turtle,
picks him up in his trunk and hurls him
far into the jungle.
"What did you do that for?" asks the crocodile.
The elephant answers, "That turtle was the
one that bit me almost fifty years ago."
The crocodile says, "And you remembered him
after all these years? Boy, you sure do
have a good memory."
"Yep," says the elephant. "I have turtle recall."



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Q: What did the porcupine say to the cactus?
A: "Is that you mommy?"



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Deep within a forest, a little
turtle began to climb a tree.
After hours of effort, he reached
the top, jumped into the air
waving his front legs and crashed
to the ground.
After recovering, he slowly
climbed the tree again, jumped,
and fell to the ground. The turtle
tried again and again, while a
couple of birds sitting on a
branch watched his sad efforts.
Finally, the female bird turned
to her mate.
"Dear" she chirped, "I think
it's time to tell him he's adopted."



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