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A guy walks into a bar and orders 6 shooters. The bartender says, "Looks like you are
having a bad day."
The guy says, "Am I ever! To start, I woke up late for work. On my way to work I got in an
accident. When I got to work I was four hours late, so the boss fired me. Then to top
everything off I came home to my wife screwing my best friend."

The bartender says, "What did you say to your wife?"

The guy says, "I told her to get out, and I never want to see her again."

The bartender says, "What did you say to your best friend?''

The guy says, ''I said BAD DOG!''




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There was a boss who was told by his boss that he had to get rid of at least one employee.
So he narrowed the decision to one of two new employees, Jack or Mary.
He then decided to speak to each one privately, and let their reactions help guide his
decision. So he called in Jack, explained the situation and, of course, Jack said he
didn't want to lose his job, but he understood the boss's situation.

Then he called in Mary, and said, 'Mary, I've got a problem; By the end of the day, I've
got to lay you or Jack off...' And Mary says, 'Then you're gonna have to jack off, buster,
I've got a headache!'



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A man comes home with his little daughter,
whom he has just taken to work. The little
girl asks, "I saw you in your office with
your secretary. Why do you call her a doll?"
Feeling his wife's gaze upon him, the man
explains, "Well, honey, my secretary is a
very hard-working girl. She types like you
wouldn't believe, she knows the computer
system and is very efficient."
"Oh," says the little girl, "I thought it
was because she closed her eyes when you
lay her down on the couch."


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A lady walked into a bar and there
were no seats available, except for
one at a table that was occupied by
a man, and she decides to take it.
He said, "Hello, my name is Jim Snow,
what's yours?"
The women replied, "June."
She went to get a drink and Jim Snow
sat there smiling at her. When she
came back he still sat there smiling.
June was a little embarrassed, so
she bashfully said, "Why are you smiling
at me like that?"
Jim answered, "Well, just imagine
having 6 inches of Snow in June!"


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